So, fucking Yola jacked up my blog. I wanted to try out a new layout and I clicked something to try and I couldn't get it back to the old one. So this is the best thing I could find. I'll try and fix it some other time but I haven't figured out how to get my old site layout back. This fucking layout is so annoying. I hate it. I miss my menu in a sidebar and I hate how 'wannabe perfect' this layout is. Asdfghjlk. Anyway, today was okay. I watched Harry Potter again this morning (school didn't start until twelve) which was the highlight of my day. School is such a prison. I'm so over academics. I'm so over teachers. I'm so over people. I hate being surrounded by crowds trying to get to class, and I hate sitting in class and being judged. I hate studying my ass off for tests and then failing them. I hate self-centered girls and mean guys. I hate the high expectations I set for people and they end up being way below them. My teachers are bipolar and my friends barely like me most of the time. I'm so done waiting for something good to happen and ending up lying in bed at night dreaming up impossible situations. I hate seeing the happiness in people and wondering why I can't be at school like that. My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend to come and then when it comes, doing nothing. I tell myself that it's just one day but it's not. Every single day of my life I lie in bed and beg the universe to not make me get up and go to hell. Yeah sure, some days are fantastic and sometimes my friends are perfect, but most days I could care less about life. You know there is something wrong with schools when you realize that ninety percent of the people literally would rather kill themselves than be there. I really want someone to just sit and watch movies and cuddle with. Whether that be a boyfriend who doesn't expect much from me, or just a best friend that I feel totally comfortable with. I hate having to sit in school and wonder about my future and know that I have absolutely nothing planned. By the time senior year comes I need to have some sort of plan because right now I'm just dead. And my parents need to fucking get personality checkups because I'm so done with them too. Nothing even really happened today that put me in a bad mood, I just am. That's horrible. To be in a bad mood for no reason at all. Adults think teenagers just make big deals out of nothing but unless you actually are a teenager, you don't know what it's like. Sorry for this post. It's just basically me complaining. I need someone that I can actually complain to, and them not judge me. Until then, that person is my blog. More later,
Heather.